Here's the deal: I've seen "bring the kids for heaps of family fun" in scripts on average, once a week, every week of my career.
A lot of the time, that line is fine. A lot of the time it's not.
I hate it for a number of reasons - both how it's written and the sentiment behind it.
1. They say 'bring' instead of 'take'
Use 'bring' when you're at a location, use 'take' when you're not.
Read my thoughts on that here.
2. Take the kids
I get it, you want to encourage families to visit a location by telling parents that their kids wont be bored... but do you really want to go somewhere that's boring for you? It's like going to see a movie with the kids and there's nothing for the parents.
Let's say you want to encourage mums and dads, consider saying "there's heaps of fun for the kids and mum and dad too".
3. "Family fun"
This has to be the best way to say 'fun for the whole family' in just two words. If you have time, tell people what's on offer! What is the fun?
The full line of copy might read something like:
"There's heaps on for the kids, like face painters, a jumping castle and Spongebob Squarepants... and mums and dads will have the chance to win $1000."
4. Does the family fun fit?
I recently saw a rugby team promoting the Easter Bunny at a game. Will families be more inclined to watch a sport they don't understand and keep the kids up 3 hours past their bedtime just because the Easter Bunny is going to be there?
It's probably cheaper for dad to hire the costume and a bag of eggs than a family ticket.
Consider family fun that fits your brand. Instead, let kids meet players and throw a ball AKA get them passionate about the sport, not the gimmicks.
5. Let's get realistic
Will a mum and/or dad really detour from their plans of a relaxing weekend to go to a car dealership and risk buying a car they don't need, just so their daughter can turn into a butterfly for a couple of hours?
6. Remember why you're advertising
Each spot, pamphlet etc needs to see a mean return on investment. Why waste that time or space plugging a face painter or jumping castle? I would suggest promoting why the parents (your actual target) MUST visit you. After all, they're calling the shots.
I don't know why advertisers continue to make those simple mistakes. I can help you avoid them, simply contact me for freelance work. See more of my work here.